Defensive Driving Tips For Drivers & Bicyclists

Rule number one in defensive driving: Do NOT ever trust the other driver/bicyclist. Ever. Assume the worst. Pay attention, and assume the other guy WILL do something wrong/illegal. Stop signs and red traffic lights don't physically stop any vehicle. Not cars. Not trucks. Not bikes. Just because a vehicle is signaling for a turn doesn't mean they'll turn. Just because a vehicle isn't signaling for a turn doesn't mean they aren't going to turn in front of you. Just because you see them doesn't mean they can see you.

Rule number two: All things being equal, even if you have the legal right of way, the biggest vehicle ALWAYS has the "it's a jungle out there" right of way. Vehicles that ignore your legal right of way also ALWAYS have the "jungle" right of way. You can't control the other driver/bicyclists' actions, but you CAN control your own actions! Yield even when you shouldn't have to! Be safe! Pay attention and stay alive!

Rule number three: Never, ever ever change lanes in an intersection. You already have to look out for cross traffic, why complicate your awareness load by worrying about some jerk coming behind you in your blind spot?

Rule number four: Watch out ahead of you! Especially watch out for sudden lane changes of vehicles that might cut you off at intersections, retail shop parking lots, or freeway off-ramps.

Rule number five: While this might be difficult for bicyclists that are going slower than other traffic, try your best to keep a "space bubble" around you as you go down the road. It's nice to have somewhere you can swerve to in case someone cuts you off. Don't change lanes constantly. Blend in with traffic.

Rule number six: Pay attention! Don't distract yourself. Don't drive and use a cell phone. Don't text message. Don't eat, put on makeup, read the newspaper, or try to smack your kids in the back seat. You are driving a lethal weapon, not sitting in your barcolounger at home. Bicyclists: Lose the headphones! Keep both hands on those handlebars! If you're on a busy street, don't just dream- cruise as if you're on a bikes only path. If you're drafting, don't trust the bikes in front of you to pay attention! YOU pay attention, too, to what's going on up the road!

Rule number seven: Don't drive or bicycle if you're tired, or upset, or distracted by thoughts of your daily life. Pay attention to what you're doing! Going on mental autopilot will get you in trouble fast!

Rule number eight: VERY important rule! Stay the heck out of those "suicide lanes", aka the two-way center turn lane! You WILL get nailed eventually if you use those suckers! It's better to turn right and find a traffic light or stop sign to make a safer way to go in the direction you want to go.

Rule number nine: Develop your "sixth sense" of probable idiotic behavior by those other folks out there.

Rule number ten: for car/truck drivers. PLEASE give bikes on the road a wide berth. You can make a mistake and only get a fender scrape, but your mistake will probably severely injure or kill the bicyclist. If you're stopped for a light and you saw a bicyclist somewhere "back there", Be extra, extra careful! Try to make visual contact if you're about to turn right!

Screw the driver behind you if they start that honking garbage. Count one thousand one one thousand two when the light changes to green. Not only will you reduce your chances of being hit be a cross traffic red light runner, your probability of visually spotting "that bike back there" increases significantly. Two seconds! one thousand one, one thousand two! Two seconds could save your life or someone else's life!

I'm not saying you'll never get in an accident if you drive/ride defensively. A very small chance exists that an accident is unavoidable. But take my advice. Drive/ride defensively. It's been said many times but it's worth repeating. Insist on your right of way at your own peril. You may be right, but you could be killed. Be safe. Yield to the idiots even if you have the right of way.

Because it's a jungle out there.

How's That Working For Ya?

  I was thinking about my very first job the other day. My first job was as a "paperboy" for the Eugene Register-Guard. 

I started wondering what other people's first jobs were, so I did some scientific research online, courtesy of Google.

I was amazed at the first jobs people had!  Here are a few examples of first jobs:

"My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate."

"I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax."

"I was a barber, but I just couldn't cut it." 

"I was a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy."

"I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have the patients."

"I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income."

"I got a job as a historian but I realized there was no future in it" 

"I was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind."

I never worked at Starbucks or in an orange juice factory. But I have worked in offices for the majority of my career. Offices have their ups and downs.  Their biggest advantage is that they're indoors, so on the icy, cold nasty days that we've had lately, offices are generally pleasant places to work.

If you've worked in offices that are set up as the proverbial "cubicle farm",  you know that  indoor offices aren't the cushy place that people who work out in the elements think they are. Working in a cubicle is sometimes a lot like being in a prison. 

Don't believe me? Think about the following comparisons between working in an office and being in prison. In some ways, prison may look like a better deal!

At work, you spend the majority of your time in a 6’x 8’ cubicle.

In prison, you spend the majority of your time in an 8’ x 10’ cell.

In prison, you get 3 meals a day.

At work you only get a break for 1 meal. And you have to pay for it!

In prison, you get time off for good behavior.

 At work, you get rewarded for good behavior with...MORE WORK!!

In prison, there are wardens who are sick, evil, twisted, and cruel.

At work, we have. . . managers.

 If your job seems more like being in prison, it's probably time to look for another job. Call your boss and say you can’t come in to work because you’re sick. When your boss asks what’s wrong, say you have a vision problem--You can’t see yourself working for him anymore. 

It's no orange juice factory, but I like my job. Would you like to know one of the things I like best about my job? I have an eight minute commute to work. Unlike most of you, I don't have to deal with this every day: